So im sitting on some stairs outside of my house in this BEAUTIFUL weather and i looked down and saw a weed that was growing by my feet. So i started picking at it..not really thinking about it. I just broke off all the long pieces that were sticking out until i got to the base of it. And i couldnt really do much more to it without entirely uprooting the entire plant. So i grabbed it..beside the thoughts that quickly popped up in my mind.. ones like: im probably gonna get some dirt under my nails from it. And its just one stupid weed..theres a buttload of them all across my yard. Why am i even wasting my attention on this. But i started pulling at it anyways and it felt like i was gonna break it. So i tenderly, but at the same time with a solid tug, ripped it out of the ground. And it disturbed the ground some..im looking at it right now and theres a bunch of dirt laying in a mess from where the weed earlier was present
And all of a sudden the Holy Spirit kinda smacked me on the forehead.
This is an excellent metaphor for our life. And then there was another smack on my head reminding me of what i had decided to title my blog. haha...good one Kasey.
We all have junk in our lives..plenty of it. Weeds in our hearts. But God wants to make us Christ like..which requires a lot of ripping out those weeds. But because were kinda dumb, theres usually a whole process that we make ourselves go through.
We often see those weeds and instead of going straight for the root, we start to pick at it. Thinking that simply picking off the little edges of it will make it disappear. Until we waste all the time picking at it, get to the base of it, and realize the problem really hasnt disappeared at all. It may not look as obnoxious, but the problem will quickly grow back.
So from there, we sit back and realize we need to just uproot it. But right away the enemy and our flesh begin to plant lies and doubts in our minds. Things like: its gonna require me getting some dirt under my nails. Or, its only one weed, one small thing in my life. Theres so many weeds in my heart...why does this one really matter? Why am i wasting my attention on this?
But hopefully we get past those thoughts and finally grab a hold of it and begin to tug. But sometimes it requires a tender tug, and other times it requires some force to make sure we get it all out.
And after uprooting it, it doesnt always look very pretty. Like the ground by my feet, its kinda a mess.
John 15 is amazing. Read it. Jesus makes it very clear when he is talking here that if we are plants that dont bear fruit, we are thrown into a fire and burned. AH. But if we are branches that abide in him and bear fruit, he will prune us, so that we may bear more fruit. Within those plants that bear fruit, there is always still weeds that need to be pruned and uprooted from it.
So we must be willing to allow him to uproot the things in our lives that prevent us from bearing more fruit. And though its not always enjoyable, its a great sign that we are abiding in him. And itll so be worth it.
Friday, August 12, 2011
Friday, July 22, 2011
Throwing Self Confidence Away.
I had bible study at Amy's last night and we discussed self confidence and self esteem.
And again i am truly amazed at what God can reveal to me and how there is ALWAYS something new that he is eager to show me.
To be honest, ive always had a huge fear of pride.
Theres verse after verse in the bible talking about how God will pull the prideful and haughty from their high positions and make them low. (Isaiah 2:9-19 is a great and God fearing passage on this!)
And knowing how much God despises the prideful, and knowing how easily i become prideful- scares me.
Because ive never really been able to figure out the line between having confidence and having pride.
But last night really showed me something new..and its even a concept ive heard before, but God showed me a personal revelation on it! (and until we receive that revelation, information will only be information..nothing more)
So I realized, self confidence is absolutely one of the WORST concepts we have planted into our minds.
We are all nothing. absolutely nothing.
(i know..ouch Kasey..)
but this is so true. WE ARE NOTHING. we are evil and wicked. our flesh desires what is not from God.
So now let me ask you...why in the world would we EVER SAY TO PUT CONFIDENCE IN THAT?!
When we tell people to have self confidence, we are telling them to put confidence in their own broken self. No wonder so many people have problems with depression and addictions. They are attempting to put their confidence in NOTHING.
Ive been told that im good. Im always picked as the "good little church girl" on those stupid facebook surveys. Im called good looking two shoes. etc.
Which dont get me wrong, im happy that people see that in me!
But what they dont realize is that my heart is junk.
Now if i compare it to others, i might be able to say my heart doesnt look to dirty! BUT were not called to compare ourselves to others. 2 Cor 10:12 says people who compare themselves with others are without wisdom. i basically read that as Paul calling them stupid..haha.
But were called to compare ourselves to Jesus. And i guarantee that when my heart is placed next to his, it looks like junk. its dirt.
So I am NOT good. I am NOTHING.
And when we try to prove being good, we are trying to show ourselves as worthy. (worthy= what we deserve..and what we deserve is Hell. ah!!) And trying to show ourselves worthy means we try to create our own righteousness, not His. We dont create our own righteousness. GOD GIVES IT TO US.
Paul quotes Jesus in 2 Cor 12:9 "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness"
basically thats saying until we accept our weaknesses, he cant display his power!
The greatest blessing spiritually is having nothing. Being nothing. Because it allows us to be filled with his POWER. and his RIGHTEOUSNESS.
and we cant be filled unless we are empty.
Now i dont know if i explained this well enough or not...but i encourage you to read Romans. Because it discusses this a lot. And when realizing that we are nothing, and that everything righteous in us is from God, then that book makes a lot more sense!
I also encourage you to read 2 Cor 10-12.
Im excited to be able to start living out the realization that I am nothing. Because being nothing means i can allow him to be everything.
And again i am truly amazed at what God can reveal to me and how there is ALWAYS something new that he is eager to show me.
To be honest, ive always had a huge fear of pride.
Theres verse after verse in the bible talking about how God will pull the prideful and haughty from their high positions and make them low. (Isaiah 2:9-19 is a great and God fearing passage on this!)
And knowing how much God despises the prideful, and knowing how easily i become prideful- scares me.
Because ive never really been able to figure out the line between having confidence and having pride.
But last night really showed me something new..and its even a concept ive heard before, but God showed me a personal revelation on it! (and until we receive that revelation, information will only be information..nothing more)
So I realized, self confidence is absolutely one of the WORST concepts we have planted into our minds.
We are all nothing. absolutely nothing.
(i know..ouch Kasey..)
but this is so true. WE ARE NOTHING. we are evil and wicked. our flesh desires what is not from God.
So now let me ask you...why in the world would we EVER SAY TO PUT CONFIDENCE IN THAT?!
When we tell people to have self confidence, we are telling them to put confidence in their own broken self. No wonder so many people have problems with depression and addictions. They are attempting to put their confidence in NOTHING.
Ive been told that im good. Im always picked as the "good little church girl" on those stupid facebook surveys. Im called good looking two shoes. etc.
Which dont get me wrong, im happy that people see that in me!
But what they dont realize is that my heart is junk.
Now if i compare it to others, i might be able to say my heart doesnt look to dirty! BUT were not called to compare ourselves to others. 2 Cor 10:12 says people who compare themselves with others are without wisdom. i basically read that as Paul calling them stupid..haha.
But were called to compare ourselves to Jesus. And i guarantee that when my heart is placed next to his, it looks like junk. its dirt.
So I am NOT good. I am NOTHING.
And when we try to prove being good, we are trying to show ourselves as worthy. (worthy= what we deserve..and what we deserve is Hell. ah!!) And trying to show ourselves worthy means we try to create our own righteousness, not His. We dont create our own righteousness. GOD GIVES IT TO US.
Paul quotes Jesus in 2 Cor 12:9 "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness"
basically thats saying until we accept our weaknesses, he cant display his power!
The greatest blessing spiritually is having nothing. Being nothing. Because it allows us to be filled with his POWER. and his RIGHTEOUSNESS.
and we cant be filled unless we are empty.
Now i dont know if i explained this well enough or not...but i encourage you to read Romans. Because it discusses this a lot. And when realizing that we are nothing, and that everything righteous in us is from God, then that book makes a lot more sense!
I also encourage you to read 2 Cor 10-12.
Im excited to be able to start living out the realization that I am nothing. Because being nothing means i can allow him to be everything.
Saturday, July 9, 2011
The good taking over the GREAT.
Every time i think that im going good, Holy Spirit tends to show me something else that i really could work on/ was comprehending and doing and then easily drifted back from.
He's never giving me a break...and im loving it :)
My family is up in northern Minnesota right now at a fishing resort for vacation. From the start i havent been able to shake the thoughts about how i feel like im wasting a week. In complete comfort and relaxation. When we could be spending our time and resources for the kingdom instead. Which sounds kinda crazy. Especially because never have i felt like this for the past 6 or 7 years weve come to this resort. But i guess thats what happens when we change our mindset to one of a radical God.
So I was sitting by the pool just a few mins ago reading a book called "Jesus Culture" by Banning Liebscher. And around me are a bunch of crazy children screaming and being selfish about who gets to use the goggles. And to my right was a group of adults with a bunch of beer and foul mouths. And i kept thinking about how i had to do something. (And dont get too excited..this isnt a blog about overcoming a fear story) But i kept thinking about what I, ME, had to do. Maybe i should go play with the kids. Or maybe i could just walk up to the crazy, obnoxious drunks and ask them if they know Jesus.
Instead though, the Holy Spirit decided to simply show me something else.
All of a sudden i read in my book a story about a revivalist named Kathryn Kuhlman.
And it stated: "Kuhlman was a woman who adored the Holy Spirit, and the Holy Spirit loved to hang out with her because she was a friend of God."
Wow.
Now ived discussed before the revelation that really hit me about how we are called to be a friend to God. That he is longing for a relationship from us. not a one way relationship where we take, we ask, we receive, we complain, we ask again, etc. But one where we sit and are his friend. we sit and ask him what He is thinking. What he is wanting. To be a friend to him along with him being a friend to us.
And when i read that in the book, it simply clicked to me. The importance isnt for me to figure out what I have to do. But instead just to be his friend, and what i do will overflow from that. (Because if the HS loved to hang out with you...there is no way that nothing would overflow from that!! :) )
Sounds simple enough. But Ive found that sometimes the simplest things tend to be the most difficult to really execute.
Way too often i get thinking that i need to do this, or do that. Which im not saying is a bad thing! It would had been awesome if i had went and played with the little kids in the pool or talked to the loud people sitting near me.
But the KEY is- we cant let the good things over take the GREAT things.
Did you catch that?
The good things would be to interact with the little kids who seemed like they probably dont have great role models in their life. Or it would be a good thing to witness to the drunks! Those are good things!!
But the GREAT things are to love and know our GOD.
we cant allow our passion to do good to ever over take our desire, and actually our NEED to have the great.
And im completely confident that when we have the GREAT things in our life, the good will always quickly follow.
Now its not an excuse for me to not do the good things. Because to be honest, i dont really enjoy playing with bratty kids. And the idea of actually physically getting up and taking a few steps over to a bunch of obnoxious adults and asking them if they knew Jesus, scared me.
But i also began to realize that if i really had a REAL and LEGIT relationship and friendship built with God, the God who created freaking EVERYTHING, and he asked me to go play with kids or go talk to some strangers, i would do it in a heartbeat. For our God? why would i even dare think about not?!
Because i havent yet established the GREAT things before i attempt to do the good.
He's never giving me a break...and im loving it :)
My family is up in northern Minnesota right now at a fishing resort for vacation. From the start i havent been able to shake the thoughts about how i feel like im wasting a week. In complete comfort and relaxation. When we could be spending our time and resources for the kingdom instead. Which sounds kinda crazy. Especially because never have i felt like this for the past 6 or 7 years weve come to this resort. But i guess thats what happens when we change our mindset to one of a radical God.
So I was sitting by the pool just a few mins ago reading a book called "Jesus Culture" by Banning Liebscher. And around me are a bunch of crazy children screaming and being selfish about who gets to use the goggles. And to my right was a group of adults with a bunch of beer and foul mouths. And i kept thinking about how i had to do something. (And dont get too excited..this isnt a blog about overcoming a fear story) But i kept thinking about what I, ME, had to do. Maybe i should go play with the kids. Or maybe i could just walk up to the crazy, obnoxious drunks and ask them if they know Jesus.
Instead though, the Holy Spirit decided to simply show me something else.
All of a sudden i read in my book a story about a revivalist named Kathryn Kuhlman.
And it stated: "Kuhlman was a woman who adored the Holy Spirit, and the Holy Spirit loved to hang out with her because she was a friend of God."
Wow.
Now ived discussed before the revelation that really hit me about how we are called to be a friend to God. That he is longing for a relationship from us. not a one way relationship where we take, we ask, we receive, we complain, we ask again, etc. But one where we sit and are his friend. we sit and ask him what He is thinking. What he is wanting. To be a friend to him along with him being a friend to us.
And when i read that in the book, it simply clicked to me. The importance isnt for me to figure out what I have to do. But instead just to be his friend, and what i do will overflow from that. (Because if the HS loved to hang out with you...there is no way that nothing would overflow from that!! :) )
Sounds simple enough. But Ive found that sometimes the simplest things tend to be the most difficult to really execute.
Way too often i get thinking that i need to do this, or do that. Which im not saying is a bad thing! It would had been awesome if i had went and played with the little kids in the pool or talked to the loud people sitting near me.
But the KEY is- we cant let the good things over take the GREAT things.
Did you catch that?
The good things would be to interact with the little kids who seemed like they probably dont have great role models in their life. Or it would be a good thing to witness to the drunks! Those are good things!!
But the GREAT things are to love and know our GOD.
we cant allow our passion to do good to ever over take our desire, and actually our NEED to have the great.
And im completely confident that when we have the GREAT things in our life, the good will always quickly follow.
Now its not an excuse for me to not do the good things. Because to be honest, i dont really enjoy playing with bratty kids. And the idea of actually physically getting up and taking a few steps over to a bunch of obnoxious adults and asking them if they knew Jesus, scared me.
But i also began to realize that if i really had a REAL and LEGIT relationship and friendship built with God, the God who created freaking EVERYTHING, and he asked me to go play with kids or go talk to some strangers, i would do it in a heartbeat. For our God? why would i even dare think about not?!
Because i havent yet established the GREAT things before i attempt to do the good.
Thursday, June 30, 2011
Covered in Eyes
So i made two big official decisions in my life in these last few days:
#1)
(it isnt important at all but im excited!! haha)
Im officially going to develop a selection of EPIC music...and play it during life's boring moments.
like brushing my teeth.
because having epic music in the background while brushing your teeth, all of a sudden makes brushing your teeth EPIC!
ive been thinking about this for a while now..but decided i really want to do it. so im gonna.
okay now that ive gotten my idiotic one out of the way :) ...
#2)
i want to be covered in eyes.
sounds weird...let me explain.
i started to get slightly worked up yesterday. i was sitting in duos and just praying and thinking about how much passion and zeal i have for Him right now.
and all of a sudden a fear rushed over me that i would some day lose that passion.
and i was scared enough that tears were coming to my eyes!!
it really freaked me out.
because i cant imagine not having that passion and love that i do now for Jesus.
But i dont see passion in that many people who are older.
And a- i know that there are plenty of people who still love Jesus like CRAZY..and are also old or older.
b- i know i also always say that any fear that isnt the fear of the Lord, isnt good fear. But i really want to be able to think and walk through this fear.
So i got thinking of the four creatures in Rev 4.
vs 8: "Each of the four living creatures had six wings and was covered with eyes all around, even under his wings. DAY AND NIGHT THEY NEVER STOPPED SAYING: 'Holy, holy, holy is the Lord God Almightly, who was, and is, and is to come.' "
These creatures are currently gazing upon God and are praising him. And have been praising God since eternity started and will be forever and ever! Thats crazy.
But its interesting to start thinking about if these creatures have free will. Because angels did. So would it be possible for one of the creatures to decide..."meh...im done with this..lets go find something/ somehow else to serve."
But the key is- they would never want to leave. BECAUSE THEY ARE COVERED IN EYES. This representing the fact that they can see soo much more of God. Every time they look at Him im sure they see a new facet of his glory...for all of eternity! Over and over again they get to see something new about how amazing our God is. That even if one of those creatures wanted to leave, as they would start to turn away...one of their eyes would catch something new about God they have never realized before and it pulls them right back to saying "Holy holy holy!"
(Now i highly doubt the creatures want to leave in the first place...theyre right dab in middle of the throne room! I dont know if anyone would be able to leave! haha)
So, my heart's prayer is to be covered in eyes.
And im beginning to realize its a pretty bold prayer.
Because it means i constantly want to grow. And the moment i start to feel a dry season, or i start to turn away from gazing upon the glory of God, i want myself (or Him to show me is a better way to say it!) to be able to catch a new facet of Him ive never seen before.
Like Solomon asked for wisdom (which is good and i will always pray for more of that as well) -what i really want is to be able to constantly look at Him and have a new desire and passion opened up in me where i can look at Him and have my mind blown! over and over again. and over again!
I want to be like the creatures..i want to be covered in eyes. Where i can constantly glimpse something new and awesome about Him. And itll just make me worship, love, and serve Him all the more!
Please Jesus, help that become my heart's prayer.
#1)
(it isnt important at all but im excited!! haha)
Im officially going to develop a selection of EPIC music...and play it during life's boring moments.
like brushing my teeth.
because having epic music in the background while brushing your teeth, all of a sudden makes brushing your teeth EPIC!
ive been thinking about this for a while now..but decided i really want to do it. so im gonna.
okay now that ive gotten my idiotic one out of the way :) ...
#2)
i want to be covered in eyes.
sounds weird...let me explain.
i started to get slightly worked up yesterday. i was sitting in duos and just praying and thinking about how much passion and zeal i have for Him right now.
and all of a sudden a fear rushed over me that i would some day lose that passion.
and i was scared enough that tears were coming to my eyes!!
it really freaked me out.
because i cant imagine not having that passion and love that i do now for Jesus.
But i dont see passion in that many people who are older.
And a- i know that there are plenty of people who still love Jesus like CRAZY..and are also old or older.
b- i know i also always say that any fear that isnt the fear of the Lord, isnt good fear. But i really want to be able to think and walk through this fear.
So i got thinking of the four creatures in Rev 4.
vs 8: "Each of the four living creatures had six wings and was covered with eyes all around, even under his wings. DAY AND NIGHT THEY NEVER STOPPED SAYING: 'Holy, holy, holy is the Lord God Almightly, who was, and is, and is to come.' "
These creatures are currently gazing upon God and are praising him. And have been praising God since eternity started and will be forever and ever! Thats crazy.
But its interesting to start thinking about if these creatures have free will. Because angels did. So would it be possible for one of the creatures to decide..."meh...im done with this..lets go find something/ somehow else to serve."
But the key is- they would never want to leave. BECAUSE THEY ARE COVERED IN EYES. This representing the fact that they can see soo much more of God. Every time they look at Him im sure they see a new facet of his glory...for all of eternity! Over and over again they get to see something new about how amazing our God is. That even if one of those creatures wanted to leave, as they would start to turn away...one of their eyes would catch something new about God they have never realized before and it pulls them right back to saying "Holy holy holy!"
(Now i highly doubt the creatures want to leave in the first place...theyre right dab in middle of the throne room! I dont know if anyone would be able to leave! haha)
So, my heart's prayer is to be covered in eyes.
And im beginning to realize its a pretty bold prayer.
Because it means i constantly want to grow. And the moment i start to feel a dry season, or i start to turn away from gazing upon the glory of God, i want myself (or Him to show me is a better way to say it!) to be able to catch a new facet of Him ive never seen before.
Like Solomon asked for wisdom (which is good and i will always pray for more of that as well) -what i really want is to be able to constantly look at Him and have a new desire and passion opened up in me where i can look at Him and have my mind blown! over and over again. and over again!
I want to be like the creatures..i want to be covered in eyes. Where i can constantly glimpse something new and awesome about Him. And itll just make me worship, love, and serve Him all the more!
Please Jesus, help that become my heart's prayer.
Monday, June 27, 2011
To be weird or not to be. Now is that the Question? ...
So reading hannahs blog makes me realize i need to actually start blogging :)
So i went out for lunch today with my dad.
Its been really cool lately because him and i have actually gotten into some pretty good, deep conversations.
(and depending on how much you know my dad, youll realize hes not a very serious guy!)
But we got talking today about my future and the importance of college..which is still a huge blob of a mess in my mind..maybe ill blog about that sometime soon. but not now. haha
But we also started discussing the importance of the work of the Holy Spirit in our church. And how difficult it is to find the happy medium between putting God into a box and abusing the spiritual gifts that the HS provides.
And this is beginning to become a very big question in my mind.
Because i have no doubt that our church is missing something. And im not meaning just Open Bible. And i also dont mean all American churches...because there are definitely churches that are very in tune with what God is calling the church to be like.
But where is the line? between pushing away and denying the power that God is desiring to hand his disciples. And being culturally friendly in a way that we are able to bring more people into the church and into a relationship with Christ.
My dad told me about a church they attending out in Washington State. He said there were laying of hands, speaking in tongues, interrupting of tongues and so forth. And it freaked them out. A lot. As new believers at the time, it was understandably freaky. But it almost pushed my parents more away from it instead of bringing them into realization of the power of the HS.
But what should we do?
Water down the power of the HS?
Make Christianity comfortable for people?
Because then comes the worry about fluff.
I hate fluff.
We dont want to bring people into a false Christianity of a nice fluffy religion when there is actually so much more that we are holding back from them?
What if we made the supernatural the natural?
The abnormal the norm for the church?
To step out and be okay being weird...because according to what the worlds standards are, we should be weird.
So i went out for lunch today with my dad.
Its been really cool lately because him and i have actually gotten into some pretty good, deep conversations.
(and depending on how much you know my dad, youll realize hes not a very serious guy!)
But we got talking today about my future and the importance of college..which is still a huge blob of a mess in my mind..maybe ill blog about that sometime soon. but not now. haha
But we also started discussing the importance of the work of the Holy Spirit in our church. And how difficult it is to find the happy medium between putting God into a box and abusing the spiritual gifts that the HS provides.
And this is beginning to become a very big question in my mind.
Because i have no doubt that our church is missing something. And im not meaning just Open Bible. And i also dont mean all American churches...because there are definitely churches that are very in tune with what God is calling the church to be like.
But where is the line? between pushing away and denying the power that God is desiring to hand his disciples. And being culturally friendly in a way that we are able to bring more people into the church and into a relationship with Christ.
My dad told me about a church they attending out in Washington State. He said there were laying of hands, speaking in tongues, interrupting of tongues and so forth. And it freaked them out. A lot. As new believers at the time, it was understandably freaky. But it almost pushed my parents more away from it instead of bringing them into realization of the power of the HS.
But what should we do?
Water down the power of the HS?
Make Christianity comfortable for people?
Because then comes the worry about fluff.
I hate fluff.
We dont want to bring people into a false Christianity of a nice fluffy religion when there is actually so much more that we are holding back from them?
What if we made the supernatural the natural?
The abnormal the norm for the church?
To step out and be okay being weird...because according to what the worlds standards are, we should be weird.
Tuesday, June 14, 2011
Okay...were just gonna dive right in.
I was thinking about having some awesome first blog..something creative and witty about starting a blog!
and then i realized that im clearly not gonna be able to think of that clever post..leading to me never actually starting this blog.
So were just gonna go for it. :)
Something that has been on my heart a lot lately is the fact that we as Americans are so comfortable.
And dont get me wrong, im very thankful for everything God has blessed me with. But he has blessed me to be a blessing to others. He has blessed US...as individuals and as a nation to be a blessing to those around us.
And this is addressed towards his people.
Hes not telling the people who dont know him or love him to do it. Hes calling his people. His disciples. But somehow, we as his church are doing worse at this than people who dont even know Jesus.
And its because we are comfortable.
I heard it said the other day,
"Weve made Christianity and the American Dream the same thing. Thats why every American is Christian."
Huh...yeah. It definitely got me thinking.
We have created this lie within the American Church that being a Christian means we get to have a nice comfortable life. One where we can sit back and God will provide because he loves us and wants us to be happy.
Which He does! But his version of happiness looks EXTREMELY different than what our society tells us.
His version of happiness does not involve comfort, money, fame.
His version of happiness consists of living a life here on this earth that is glorifying Him! Because it is all about Him. We are made to worship our Creator. To partner with God. To have an intimate and so very real relationship with Him! And when we do that- we find true happiness. And want nothing else but for everyone around us to be able to experience the same.
This leads us to become radical. Giving up everything that might seem important to this world and culture...and living completely for Christ.
To live a life like the first church. Where comfort didnt matter!
Where the only thing that mattered was to live for Him. Where they did not allow themselves to live their lives in a way that their culture set out for them, but instead to live the way God set out for them.
To live like that.
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